Haruhi Will Surely React if I Love You
by IKEMEN
Summary: HIATUS Under hiatus for like, how many years has it been? Anyway Haruhi S2 is underway, probably something can kick in my head to continue this. Also, I think I'm going to do a massive overhaul on my language usages and plotting for the next chapter.
1. Chapter 1

I suddenly got the idea to do a fanfic about Haruhi Suzumiya. The main idea here is what if… in order to spark reactions from Haruhi… Ryoko Asakura does not need to kill Kyon unlike last time. of course, she tried to kill Kyon just for that, and of course she didn't manage to thanks to Yuki Nagato's interference. But now she will be doing something different to achieve that objective, and that's where my devilish plan comes out from – KyonxRyoko Bwahahahaha (laughs evilly). How will it turn out? Will she succeed this time? Or will Nagato won't keep silent just like that? Nyehehehe. All's a mystery for me too, as everything is typed here according to whatever I want to type out at the time I am writing this story! Note: Kyon Harem intended over here (I love it.) So you could guess – KyonxHaruhixMikuruxYukixRyokoxTsuruya (whuddaheck!? I'm evil! I didn't even spare Tsuruya-san! Oh, I think that's just being myself. Whatever it is, I'm going to enjoy myself writing this one. \Oo;;/)

For those who follow my FE8: SS (Fire Emblem 8: Sacred Stones) fanfic regarding my OC inside there, I'm really sorry for being so silent for almost a year now! Really, I have not been playing it, so I guess I trashed yet another fanfic ;; hontou ni gomen nasai DX

Okay, enough personal rantings here. Let's see the craziness.

* * *

Damn, I thought. I'm done for this time! Nagato is not around to help me unlike last time!

I was stuck in this classroom due to Asakura Ryoko's 'bogus magic', or so as I call it, and I am on the verge of losing MY LIFE! Oh no, this can't happen to me now, I'm still young to die yet, just yet! No! Not now, I kept telling myself.

"Finally, Kyon, I get my second chance to check upon Haruhi's reaction depending on what happens next, won't I?" Asakura said with a smile, which of course sends more chills towards me.

"N-N-NO! Asakura, stop it! Even though you're just a humanoid interface of the integrated data whatever-it-is, you're going way too far with this! Don't kill me, please!" I stuttered for her mercy.

Asakura's smile turned into her confused expression. "Kill you? I never mentioned about it."

"Huh?"

"To kill you would obviously have put on a disadvantage on me, since Nagato would attempt to stop me. But with this way, I believe I can gather even better information from Haruhi's reaction if I do this…" she paused.

"What!?" I replied. Is she going to do something more terrible than that? Oh, God… no, if it was Koizumi and company they would've said, "Oh, Haruhi Kami-sama!"… wait, what nonsense I am babbling about!? And why am I thinking about Koizumi's nonsense at a critical hour like this!?

"… Instead of killing you, I decided to confess my love for you. With this, I am sure to get a reaction from Haruhi," Ryoko said coolly with the smile returning to her.

At that time, time seemed as if it has stopped.. And I think my heart skipped a beat or two.

WHAT ON EARTH!? Before, she wants to kill me, now she says she loves me!? Great… I think I can imagine Haruhi making the world go upside down now. Or maybe not.

But this is going to be… like, madness! No, that's not it. It's like… this is SPARTA! Well, don't blame me for suddenly blurting that out in my mind at this moment. It's not like I created the phrase or something, I was pretty sure I got it from watching a movie or something…

"Y-y-you must be kidding me! Don't tell me your superiors tell you to do this!?" I exclaimed to her.

Asakura paused for a while. She seemed to think, but at the speed of her replying time I don't think so.

"If before I wanted to kill you to see Haruhi's reaction by myself, then this time it's the same too." After that, she began approaching me. Great. Great. Great. Kyon, look for yourself what you have done. Nagato seems to be attached to you. You know Haruhi wants you by her side, but being herself she won't admit it. You know you like Asahina-san the most and she likes you too. Now what? A former murderer-to-be now confesses to you!? Are you normal, Kyon!? Argh. I just can't stop thinking.

"Kyon," she said slowly as she reaches me and held my face with her two hands, face a bit red, "this is how two human beings are going to kiss, right?" Without further ado, she her lips reaches out for mine. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh… yes. Wait, what's with THAT YES!? Wake up, Kyon! This is just a dream! Yes, like how you were with Haruhi! A DREAM!!!

Just as when I thought the moment would be equivalent to the last time she was nearly able to finish me off, suddenly from somewhere a bang separated us. Man, this is like déjà vu. As I would expect, standing in front of me is Nagato. And for the second time, I took my breath of relief.

"Nagato!" I exclaimed.

"It's you again," Asakura said with a smile.

"In my memory's database, I didn't recall there was an instruction code ordering you to terminate this subject." So she says, with her usual face void of expressions.

Asakura just looked towards Nagato before replying with her usual innocent smile. "Your statement has errors, of course there was no orders of terminating the subject. However, Nagato, I am doing something different for your information," she replied calmly.

"Requesting reason for the enclosement of subject within the space of data." Nagato replied.

"All I want to do, in order to extract reactions from Haruhi… is by confessing my love to Kyon."

At this point I figured out Nagato would be shocked, but from her blank face it's hard to tell whether she really did or not.

"Your execution of your self-programmed command could lead to the deletion of the world. Requesting termination."

Asakura just stood there, silent. "Again, I failed to understand the empathy of human beings. I wasn't able figure out why I was not even allowed to do this… However, Nagato, my reply to your request is negative." And with this, she herself 'deprogrammed' the same realm which she used to lock me in order to not let me escape.

She then left me and Nagato alone in class. Phew. I was saved again from the clutches of non-logical adrenaline-pumping rush which was worse than riding a roller-coaster by myself.

Before I could think about Asakura, Nagato told me something.

"As an individual," she said, "I do prefer that you avoid further discussion with her."

Wow. That reaction was pretty quick. Or don't tell me this. Is she jealous? Then it'd be a new world record for someone almost as expressionless as her. But this leaves me with a brand new headache. WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT!?

_END OF CHAPTER ONE_


	2. Chapter 2

Things are getting more and more complex for Kyon! Losing concentration in class, what will be next? Read on. Note: I think I've went a bit overboard here... everyone (the characters, d'oh) seem so Out-Of-Character... well, I dare not say much, maybe I need to watch the series a few times over? Beats me DX

Ah, I forgot to put this lil' disclaimer for the first chapter...

Disclaimer: All characters and any trademarks used belong to their own respective creators/owners, I'm just borrowing (yeah right) them to make up a story of my own. Kudos to all who made them.

* * *

CHAPTER 2

In class now. I just can't stop thinking whatever has happened yesterday. Maybe it was the worst nightmare I've ever had. Or maybe not.

I got that kind of feeling just by noticing Asakura who gave me a glance from her table. Oh, great. I think maybe I have been daydreaming again in class. And Haruhi behind me, I got this feeling that she's not emitting a good aura about herself today. I wonder if she had any idea what happened between me and Asakura. No, I don't think so. But for that _"I'm going to give you a very nice punishment; a very, very nice one indeed!"_ look coming from her, now that thought does send the most chilling idea I've ever had in mind. Well, whatever it is, I don't think she had any idea about yesterday's happenings – _yet_. Else Koizumi won't be pulling that 'happy face' smile and be so much relaxed at this moment – well, maybe because this is class hour.

"Kyon, do you have any problems today? I don't see you concentrating very well from the start of our class." Okabe's sudden statement rocked me out of my mind.

"Err, umm… well, I don't think I have any. Just that maybe I have some minor indigestion problems," I replied, trying to cover myself.

The whole class returned me intrigued stares as their response. Somehow I don't think I am a good bluffer for this. I glanced behind me for a while to look at Haruhi… you know someone like her will find it hard to believe I had such problems out from nowhere. But somehow I find my own made-up story working out well for Okabe.

"I-Is that so? Then maybe I think you should head to the school's clinic. Else you won't be able to concentrate further," he said. Phew. Maybe it was not so bad of a situation after all, I got some space for escapism.

And so off I went, excusing myself to head for the clinic… What a rush.

At the school's clinic…

I went to lie down on one of the beds, thinking for myself the madness that happened yesterday. It was not for real, right? I mean, how come there's such possibility!? Now I am really stuck. I kept thinking about this over and over until I got really tired of it, and dozed off…

_Kyon._

What now? Don't disturb me yet, I'm tired…

_Kyon!_

Geez… just a bit longer, please…

_Kyon! Wake up, dammit!_

And off with a splash over my head I woke up… in the most unpleasant way that I'd love to whack whoever did that to me. So I got up, and looked upwards towards whoever has been doing that to me.

Oh, Haruhi. So I guess it's just normal for her to do that to me. Yet I decided to ask this very stupid question.

"Haruhi," I said. "What are you doing here?"

"What did you say!?" Haruhi exclaimed. Yet again… "It's only natural for the leader of the SOS Brigade to look over the welfare of its members!" Oh yeah. Surely you are right. Hey, what about my financial state, thanks to you punishing me by inviting everyone to a treat in a restaurant at my own expense! Money's part of my welfare too, you know. "Now what's with that look on your face!?"

"Huh?" I looked around her and noticed it was not only Haruhi who attended to me. The other girls – I mean, Asahina-san… my, my, she looks so cute with her worried expression, I really had hoped she tended to me instead. Oh, there was also Yuki sitting on a chair, reading her book – as usual. And I looked towards the door… Asakura was standing near it.

No. Not her again.

Seeing me who has noticed her, she just returned a smile. And I can't see good in that.

Just as I am thinking about troubles, Taniguchi and Kunikida passed by the door. They caught a glimpse of me and the girls, and I don't know whether Taniguchi purposely did this or not; but man – did I just hear his sentences correctly? "Wow, Kyon's surely in heaven now. Our class's A-rankers are all beside him, and so is Asahina-sempai. Damn you Kyon, at least let us be in your place!" What? THAT is the problem I am currently thinking of right now!?

Suddenly, out of nowhere, Koizumi comes in. "Good to see that you are all in one piece, Kyon," he said.

Gah. I'm having troubles all inside my head and that's what you have to say to me!?

If thinking about problems wasn't enough, Haruhi started dragging me away from my bed. "Come on already! You aren't going to get any better just by loafing on the bed!" Ow. And that was a nice drag I had.

Suddenly, just as she managed to get me to the door, Asakura opened her mouth to say something.

"Haruhi-san," she said. "I'm sure Kyon won't be happy being dragged around like that."

Did I hear that correct? Yeah, right. Well. I am _happy_ right now. Happy being dragged to go here and there without myself even willing for it.

All of a sudden, I suddenly felt someone helping me up. Ah, who was it? Well, as if I care anyway. This feeling makes me somewhat refreshed again, as if I am already at the gates of Heaven… And so I looked up towards who it was.

"Come on, get a hold of yourself. Kyon."

Oh, why in the world…!!! No! This is not right, I'd rather be dragged by Haruhi by being helped to get up by this but one girl – Asakura! No! Why her, she might hide a knife in her sleeves or something!

"Ah," I said, trying to remain my calmness. "Never mind, I can get up by myselves now. Thanks for the offer, though." With this I walked off and left the scene, not wanting to remember it again. This is getting more and more ridiculously difficult since yesterday!

Before I advanced further, Haruhi shouted at me, "Hey, Kyon! Where are you going!? Go to the clubroom now!"

Being frustrated I just blurted out these as a reply: "I know it _already_! Look, I need to go and take some fresh air. Else I think I can go crazy!" And so I stormed off the area as fast as I can. Damn, this is so unlike me. Me, a laid-back normal high-school student going off in a not-so good mood, hoping he would be able to wake up from a seemingly eternal nightmare.

Somewhere… in a place where you can get lots of fresh air while looking down at the school compound to think or just leave your thoughts drift away as you enjoy the view. Just guess though, I don't want them to find me here anyway.

This is going crazy. First, Suzumiya Haruhi.

I recall the day she came into our class. She stood up and introduced herself… okay that was normal – until she got to the part when she says she's only interested in aliens, time travelers, and espers. Okay, we got all three of them loitering in this silly SOS-Dan that even I am a member of. But what am I to her, really…?

Then, this Nagato Yuki.

…… Somehow the only thing I could think about her now is like how you would describe her expressions: void. Nah, but then at least she's not as difficult as Haruhi is, although you'll find it hard to figure out what she exactly wants.

Asahina Mikuru… no, Asahina-san.

I pity her for being dragged by Haruhi to join the SOS-Dan, forced to wear almost every sorts of costumes I can imagine, and that film… man. I will still say she's much better of any other option if I were given… I mean, who wouldn't?

And then… Asakura Ryoko.

Nagato's back-up, and my – after what happened to me, did I ever want not to see her again! It appears as if she's a human who never understood how immoral that kind of act is… oh wait, she was not a human being after all. So I guess the Integrated Data blah blah blah didn't tell her about why killing as a human is so much wrong? Well, maybe it was her superiors, as I recall Nagato mentioned about her belonging to the radical section of these so-called aliens… or was it something like that…

"Kyon."

I just looked down there, too lazy to think of anything much.

"Kyon."

And so I saw some students from another class pulling pranks on their poor little friend…

"Kyon… Are you… angry?"

"I'm not."

"Is that… so?" I turned back to see who was the one talking to me. Oh. Crap. Not Asakura again.

"Y-you again!?"

Silence broke our greetings.

"Kyon," she said. "Are you angry… with me?"

"Huh?" I replied. Wait, did I hear that right?

"Are you angry because… what I tried to do to you a long time ago? I-I'm sorry… about what happened then…"

This can't be true. A smiling murderer-to-be from last time, confessing her faults to me? Hey, this nightmare does not seem to be that bad either. Or maybe it's too good to be true. Whatever it is, I will keep on the defensive.

Suddenly, I slowly came to remember what I have been told by Nagato before today, which I forgot…!!!

"This time, the 'program structure' of Asakura Ryoko has been 'reconstructed' by the Integrated Data Entity in order to let her have a second chance in observations. Thus she has been 'reprogrammed' with the availability of special exclusive data components which was known amongst ordinary humans such as 'empathy' and 'emotions', however, due to the circumstances which might occur and not even understood by even her superiors, her stability has a 45.796 chance of being impaired." And so she says.

"So… umm, let me get this straight… she has been recreated with human emotions and empathy… so let's say if _that_ becomes damaged… her mentality would be impaired as well…? Now that's even scarier…"

"… Approximately… Personally, I prefer that you avoid further discussion with her, too."

… Now back to reality.

Here she stood, and me still as clueless as how I am. Come on, I just can't keep silent, think Kyon! Think!

"… Err, no, um… it's OK, it's just an incident in history…" Yeah right. My life was at stakes around that time.

"… You… you forgave me?"

"Um, yeah. That was the past, better not look back at it, right? I have to thank Yuki for stopping you, though."

And with that sentence – for the first time in my life, she showed me her depressed look. Wow, I didn't know they could do this… I mean, the 'aliens'. Yet, she returned me a weak smile.

… Is this even right to me?

"It's good…"

"Huh? You mean?"

"I'm glad… You're not angry with me anymore…" With this sentence follows the most unexpected event. She… she cried! This must be a wholly new record I must add in my diary… as if I ever wrote one.

And then, suddenly… I don't know if it was just me or was this I think I need to do, but then I approached her and… I comforted her! Wow. I think this could be my next blog entry if I do have one… as if.

Just as things were cooling down at the moment… that's when I'd prayed one particular guy would never get his way across here at all.

Taniguchi saw me. Great. Yet another benchmark in your life, oh myself? As if being with Haruhi wasn't a normal thing… yet again.

"Kyon… You, that can't be! With the highest A-ranked girl in our class… Just how normal are you, dude?!" And off he ran – to spread the news with his 'sidekick' Kunikida, of course. But during that while I don't want to guess to where his news might have leaked to.

Talk about when things just gotten weirder and weirder and weirder that you might think you are stuck in a nightmare you won't be waking up from!

_ END OF CHAPTER 2_


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

Today I just kept myself at my table and wondered about what happened yesterday. Pretty confusing and at the same time, intimidates me… especially if you want to think about this brunette behind me who dons yellow ribbons on her hair, which I had to sacrifice my first kiss in order to save the world… wait, I was just dreaming back then, didn't I?

Anyway, that doesn't have anything to do with Taniguchi and Kunikida who kept nagging me to spill out the beans. Oh, for crying out loud…!

"Come on now, Kyon… tell us what happened! Of all people, I can't believe you chose the double A plus-ranked girl from our class… Ryoko…!" After hearing that, I just can't take it as flattery – well not when it actually means bad news for me and the whole SOS-Dan. I can imagine the sequence which was about to happen right now… Haruhi gets mad, means more of these closed space monsters, and then Koizumi had to do more work… wait, I don't think I'd care for his added workload. But what about Nagato Yuki and Asahina-san?

"Didn't I explain? She was simply asking for me to help out on her class duties!"

"Oh, really? Then how do you explain the both of you hugging each other?"

Bah. As much as how I like to ponder in my thoughts, I really hate debating. "Well, you know, she was like, tired and I was just trying to keep her standing! So are you satisfied yet!?"

"Of course not!"

I sighed. Man, even with much excuse I thought would be plausible for Okabe, I still can't take it that there's still a man who refuses to accept any excuse when it involves a pretty girl and someone like me. Looks like he wants me to admit according to his expectations, huh? Now what should I fork out from my brain to shut him up?

At the same time I saw Asakura at her desk, giggling silently as her eyes met with mine. Oh, come on now! Nagato, I wish you could help me something about this!!! But…

"_Can't you just reprogram her or something?"_

_  
"No. The implementation in which the Integrated Data Entity has put as part of Asakura Ryoko's physical body code will remain in order to test the outcome of their research into understanding human feelings, a subject which they believed has caused Haruhi to react towards you, which in turn explains why you were once considered as a 'irregular factor' whenever your presence near her is detected. And I, as such, have no authority to access and reconstruct Asakura Ryoko's code anymore."_

"_Then why did they choose Asakura Ryoko to begin with, and not you?"_

_At this point I saw Yuki's face looking down for a moment (while retaining her blank expression), before replying this:_

"_Personally, I'd rather volunteer myself to be tested upon."_

_Wow. Does this mean Yuki also wishes to experience human feelings, too?_

"_However, due to circumstances known only to my superiors, it was decided that they recreate Asakura Ryoko and let her be used as a test subject for that purpose."_

_I see. So how does this serve to their purpose on observing Haruhi, or rather, what does this experiment has to do with her?_

"_This experiment is to examine the changes in humans whenever they change in terms of what you know as 'emotion', and to emulate Haruhi's reaction without having to cause irregularities caused by herself. However, the data obtained with her sudden affiliation with you is causing great concern to the Integrated Data Entity itself; it was discovered that Suzumiya Haruhi's reaction would be twice as Asakura Ryoko's, and if Haruhi were able to generate such data, the whole world would be in despair."_

… Man. So that's how fearsome human emotion is, to them.

Just as I recalled what Nagato had told me earlier about Asakura's "emulated emotions", Okabe went in to begin the class. And I glanced towards the back to see Haruhi's expression. Definitely not that kind of face you'd talk to her about how nice the weather today is… well, as if she ever bothers to listen to that anyway.

And as usual, class ends… and here I am walking in the hallway, cruising my way to the SOS-Dan's room with my usual lax self… and there you see a figure of Tsuruya-san with her usual hyperactive and cheerful self walking along the hallway…

"Ah, hey Kyon-kun! Ya look pretty washed out today aren't ya, nyoro?"

"… Ah, Tsuruya-san. Yeah, I think I was pretty worn out due to too much pressure on my attempt to put more concentration in class today…" Wow, did you hear your own words, Kyon? You did such a great lie, wonder why did that darn Taniguchi refuse to believe that! Bah, screw that thinking, I only pretended to concentrate harder today just to relieve my head from my already burdening thoughts… and without myself noticing it, I am falling down… goodbye, world, I want to take a nap for a while…

_---CRASH---_

"Nyaa?? Kyon-kun, hey Kyon-kun! Get a hold of yourself will ya… kya!" was the words I hear from her as I take my fall… but then the short shriek she gave out snapped me from what I was about to do – falling down to the floor in the hallway, about to take a nap. Then, I think my lips touched something… yet I managed to get a hold of myself back, not falling on her or anything like that. But…

"K… Kyon-kun!" Tsuruya-san said, with a somewhat disturbed look and some blush on her cheeks. Eh? Am I seeing what I am seeing right at this moment? And it seems that she was holding her forehead…

"Kyon-kun…"

Yes…?

"You… you…"

Uh-huh…??

"…kissed my… forehead…"

Err, I didn't mean to… but what's with that kind of expression I never saw from you, Tsuruya-san?

Silence.

"KYON-KUN! DOES THIS MEAN YOU ACCEPT ME AS YOUR LOVE? I'M SO MEGASSA HAPPY, NYORO!!!"

Oh. My. Goodness. What now? Tsuruya-san taking an instant liking to me? What, wait, does kissing her forehead mean that I accept her as a girlfriend or something? Is there even such a tradition!? Whoever has the knowledge out there please inform and enlighten this soul of a not-so-lucky and no longer ordinary first-year high-schooler!!!

"Err, Tsuruya-san! I-If you don't mind would you care explaining what's going on????" I asked for immediate explanation. And at this moment I'm being locked inside her hug and man, think about hyperactive people who have such a strong grip when it comes to hugging! I'm lucky that didn't strangle me out of oxygen, though… but I'm not feeling good over this…

And just what I had feared, the people who I fear the most if they saw this appeared before us. And to make it worse… _both_ of what I had feared… appeared at the same time… man, I didn't even count the possibility of both appearing at the same time! Geez… oh shit…

At one end, Asakura was standing and staring at us, rather flabbergasted on the situation right in front of her eyes.

"K… Kyon…"

"Err…" I murmured. Yet Tsuruya-san kept ignoring her until another present made her stop and turn around. Crap. Crap. Crap. It was Haruhi! And… no… Asahina-san too? MORE CRAPS!

"Kyon…" Haruhi leered at me menacingly. Bad sign.

"K… Kyon-kun…" Oh no! Not Asahina-san too! No! Please, Asahina-san, it's not what you think!

Tsuruya-san, still unaware with Haruhi's and Asahina-san's shock, greeted them with the usual way. "Yo, Haru-nyan! Mikuru-chan! Kyon-kun has just made me his new girlfriend!"

And that won't go well with Haruhi… and Asahina-san. And not to mention Asakura who was still staring at us.

Without saying anything, Haruhi grabbed me away from Tsuruya-san with such a force I never felt before being tugged by her, and held me by my collar while saying, "Kyon! Explain this! How dare you make your move on Tsuruya-san without my knowledge as the leader of the SOS-Dan!!!" I'm nagged again…

"Eh… Haru-nyan?"

Without replying to Tsuruya-san Haruhi dragged me away while shouting directly to me, "KYON! YOU'LL FOLLOW ME TO THE SOS-DAN'S ROOM AND EXPLAIN EVERYTHING THERE! LET'S GO BACK, MIKURU-CHAN!"

So much for my unluckiness. Why everything has to turn out this way?

As Haruhi drags me to my Hell ­– no, I mean the SOS-Dan's room – I took a glance on the two behind. Tsuruya-san was still puzzled over Haruhi's sudden actions, and Asakura… I can tell by looking at her worried face. Worried over what, never ask me.

_-----------------------END OF CHAPTER 3-----------------------_


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